I’m still here

I have learned so much from so many. Directly, indirectly, via observation, or through advice given. One of the most impactful pieces of advice I have ever received was to “not run from something; run to something.” The advice was given relative to changing jobs, but it applies in retirement equally well.

In preparing for this phase of life, I gave a lot of thought to my tendencies and traits. Two that came to the top as concerns are my tendency to go all in when doing most things and a general discomfort with being alone. Not a great pairing when moving from the fast lane I lived my career in to the backroads I now travel.

A month or so ago I listened to an episode of Arthur Brooks’ Art of Happiness podcast. He introduced a concept call a “liminal state.” In this context, liminality is essentially the state of transition between two stages of life. Without knowing it I am in a liminal state and intentionally taking time to determine where I want to spend my time next. Said differently, I am trying to figure out what I chose to run to in the future.

Part of my process is learning to spend time alone without being lonely. I talk with family and friends, spend time with my wife, but largely I am alone working out, reading, writing, roaming around town, or working around the house. And I am enjoying all of it. I have placed more focus on this for the past month, which is why I have not been writing this blog.

During this time I have been looking for my why before committing to what or how. There are plenty of ways to apply time to make a difference, but my intent is to be of service in a manner which feels best for my values and what I value. I have not reached any definitive conclusions yet, but I am getting close and I am still here.

Though not by design, considering big personal questions during the holiday season has been unique. The state of mind and generally positive environment provides fertile ground for openminded thought without rumination. I’m not suggesting everyone use this time of year to ponder big questions, but if you have big questions on your mind this could be a good time to give them a little more attention.

Until next time, be safe and take care.

Just saying: A number of you have asked about my friend Ahnie. He is still in the hospital and recovering well from his battle with COVID. It has been three months and Ahnie still has a long journey ahead — but at least he has a journey ahead and people who care about him to support him along the way.